Job Interview Tips: How Not to Land a Job (or How to Suck at a Job Interview)

There had been a lot of materials/blogs/tips on how to get a job so I made my own list based on the job applicants I saw earlier in the office.  A lot of the applicants looked confident and appeared to have a fair chance at making the cut…that was before I sat with the HR manager to interview them.

You can come overdressed for that custodial position.

Let this list add to the numerous tips out there…on how not to get a job.

  1. Do not come on time and do not let the company know that you will be late for your interview.
  2. Do come on time but yak about not being interviewed at the exact time of your arrival.  Do not care that there are other job applicants.  Make sure there’s a high-ranking company official passing by while you complain about not being interviewed on time.  Make sure you look irate and arrogant – that’ll put the icing on the cake.
  3. Leave out information critical to your application.
  4. Put information on your CV that are irrelevant to the job you are applying for.
  5. Badmouth previous employers and their practices without realizing that some of their practices are also present in the company you are trying to get into.
  6. When trying to pull the interviewer’s leg, let your eyes give you away.  Make your eyes shift from left to right, up and down, as if you’re hatching some devious plan.
  7. Do try to look like a graduate of BS Artistry by making very big and exaggerated hand gestures.  Your hand gestures give you more credibility.
  8. Whenever citing achievements in your previous employment, don’t make an effort to back up your claims.  The interviewers will believe you right away.
  9. When you see the interviewers smile and they laugh with you, get cocky!

In case you want to do great in your interview, just do the opposite of what I put on the list.

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