I think you have had too much on your mind lately.
I think your thoughts are all messed up.
I think maybe you got into a fight earlier or in the previous days.
Maybe it was hormonal.
Maybe you felt bothered by your presence in this world. You fiddled through thoughts of your existence.
Maybe you hate your life and your mind is just aimlessly wandering.
Maybe the boredom got to you as you tapped away on your keyboard.
What you did really caught my eye and held my attention.
I sincerely think this one’s supposed to be spelled S-A-F-F-R-O-N not Z-A-P-P-R-O-N, you idiotic label making person.
Z-A-P-P-R-O-N spells Saffron
(Note: I blogged about this one in 2007 over at Multiply.com. I do not know if the store corrected their error but it was fun finding this old story. I will check this weekend if the old label is still there.)
I lay quietly at one side of the room. As the doors opened in regular intervals, I hear the rush of feet coming at me. I hoped that they would notice me, lonely and broken. I guess the rat race is too much for most people to even bother with poor old me.
I still remember the first time you laid your eyes on me. I was the hottest and most delicious thing to you. You felt the need to have your fill. I was “IT” and you could not resist me. You had your concerns but you let go. I’m sure you let go.
As you picked me up and started our dance, I imagined your lips making contact with every piece of my body. It was pure heaven. Moment upon moment, you made sure that I felt I was the best thing you’ve ever had. I responded by giving you everything, all the best I can offer. I saw you enjoy every second of it.
At the end of the day, James Ingram could not have said it any better.
Now I lie here waiting for someone to pick me up.
I pause as I think of the things I thought of before.
The only words I can muster…
Walang hiya ka. Pagkatapos mo ako kagatan at nilaway lawayan, itinapon mo ko! Sa elevator pa! Hayup! Sana iniwan mo na lang ako dun sa bakery!
(in English: After biting into me, you dumped me in an elevator. You should have just left me in the bakery)
Note: Another entry from a blog I used to maintain. Pardon the picture, it’s supposed to be a piece of bread.
I enter the room.
Two girls giggling, fixing themselves up. They look so fresh and relaxed.
One has short hair and one has long hair that stretched across her shoulders. They laugh and nod at each other. A sign of approval, I thought.
I check them out. See how they’ll react. I look at their faces. Up and down my eyes go.
I wonder with a smile and utter thoughts in my head. Why in the world are they in the same room with me?
My heart misses a beat as I ponder what my next move will be. Should I go this way or that way? Which is better? What move will be cooler?
“Maybe the smaller space will be better? But that will definitely be louder. Sure to attract attention. The open space?” The thoughts run in and out of my head. I look like a confused dog not able to figure out where to find his bone.
With those thoughts, I breathe in all the air my lungs could ever hold…
I unzip myself and carefully look at how the two giggly girls react to the sound of my fly.
I pull it out…
and took the best piss I had in years. The ladies rest room was under maintenance and they couldn’t use it.
Well, holding it forever was not an option. I had to go.
Note: This one’s taken from a blog I used to maintain.